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“ The Beauty Hill Cat Fiasco ” [message #159060] Fri, 03 February 2012 00:09 Go to next message
jaholland is currently offline  jaholland   United States
Messages: 565
Registered: June 2010
Location: Sweet Home Alebamy
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Senior Member
“ The Beauty Hill Cat Fiasco ”
{ the real true story as told ny Joe Holland}

It was in the mid 40s the summer that I turned 8 years old
and we were living in South West Tennessee.
Dad had been in the Detroit Michigan area for about a month
when we found out that he was going to be there a few weeks
longer.
While Dad was away on his Preaching trips Mother watched over
us kids and ran our home like a German Prisoner Of War Camp.

Betty Ruth {my sister} and I were delegated specific chores that
we were responsible for while Dad was away.
Betty had to wash the dishes, make the beds, gather eggs and
help Mother churn the milk when we needed butter.

Some of my chores was to feed and milk ‘Ole Bossy’ twice a day,
chop stove wood and do what ever else Mother could come up
with and she sure could come up with some doozeys.
Some days Mother would send me to Mr. Deaton’s Store at Bethel
Springs with fresh butter and eggs to trade for coffee, sugar, etc.
{Mother could really Barter}.

Oh Well, Let me get to “The Beauty Hill Cat Fiasco”

The sunny day started out just great for me, except for a few of
the following unexpected events.
‘Ole Bossy’ kept switching her tail across my face while I was
milking, when I punched her side she kicked the milk bucket.
I caught the bucket, set it down and continued with the milking.
I figured out that ’Ole Bossy’ needed an attitude adjustment so
as I was delivering couple of extra good side punches with my
fists ’Ole Bossy’ placed her right hoof firmly in the Full Milk
Bucket.
When her hoof finally came out of that milking bucket,
I strained the milk and took it into the house.
{some things you should never tell your Mother}
That morning Betty Ruth was gathering the eggs as usual
BUT She suddenly started Screaming.
Mother sent me to the chicken house to check out what the
commotion was all about.
A snake had got into one of the Hen nests and swallowed an
egg,
then the snake went thru the wire to the next nest and swallowed
another egg.
The snake had started thru the wire to another nest but the egg
In the first nest and the egg in the second nest kept the snake
from going forward or backward.
Betty Ruth had stuck her hand up into the nest to get the first egg
but the egg that she was clutching was Inside That Snake ~

She Was Still Screaming And Holding On To That Egg that was still
in the snake when I Got There ~ I Could Not Control My Laughter.
Finally, after getting her to turn loose, I killed the snake and we
took the eggs to the house.

When we both got back inside the house Betty Ruth checked and
cleaned up the eggs while I filled up both churns with cream.
Mother sent me back outside to chop stove wood and, while Betty
Ruth was churning the cream, Mother got out the two butter press
molds to form and shape the butter.

I had just come inside the kitchen with my arms full of stove wood
When

IT

HAPPENED ~

A Day Burned Into My Memory Forever ~




“ The Beauty Hill Cat Fiasco ”


~> Mother
was laying out waxed paper and the press molds for
the Butter on the kitchen table.

~ > Berry Ruth
had just finished churning and was standing by
the stove.

~> ‘Sleepy’,
the calico cat, was asleep on the inside window sill
when I stepped inside the kitchen
with my arms around the stove wood.

I Honestly Did Not Know
That ‘MOREOVER’ {my dog}
Had Followed Me Into The Kitchen That Fateful Day ~

~> Sleepy {the cat}
Hissed, Bowed Up And Started Running ~

~~> Betty Ruth {my sister}
Screamed And Screamed~

~~~> Sista Freida {my mother}
Yelled
“GIT THAT DAWG OUTTA This HERE Kitchen RITE NOW ~

~~~> Moreover {my dog]
Barked And Took Off After The Cat ~

AND
I Threw The Stove Wood All Over That Floor
While Chasing The Dog All Thru The Kitchen ~

During that chase,
the cat jumped up on the churn,
the lid flipped over
and
the cat fell into the Butter Milk ~

Mother
reached down into the buttermilk ,
grabbed that cat,
and threw the cat out thru the kitchen window
with the dog following right behind it.

Betty Ruth said
‘Oh No, We’ve Just Lost All Of The Buttermilk
And That Butter’

Mother said “Maybe Not’ ~
Mother then skimmed up the clumps of the butter
and
while carefully picking out all of the cat hairs,
she placed the fresh clumps of butter
into the butter press molds ~

Mother Managed to salvage
and mold Two Pounds Of Butter ~
She Carefully Wrapped The Two
Beautifully Molded Pounds Of Butter
with Wax Paper
and then with newspaper.

She then placed the 2 pounds of butter
and 1 dozen eggs
in my ‘lil red Wagon.
And I was sent to Mr. Deaton’s Store At Bethel Springs.


As I entered The Store That Day Mr. Deaton asked me
just what I did I have in my lil red wagon.
I said,
‘Mr. Deaton, Mother Sent Me Here With Two Pounds Of Butter
that she made this morning
and Betty Ruth just gathered 1 dozen fresh eggs for you to sell.

Mother said for me to try to get a Dollar for the Butter
But
Don’t take less than 50 cents ~

Mr. Deaton Took 50 cents out of his pocket and gave it to me.
He patted me on the head and said;
“ Joe, You’ll Get A Whole Lot Further In This World
If You Learn Not To Tell Everything That You Know”
I Looked Down At That 50 cents
and Quickly put it into my pocket.

As I Thought About Betty Ruth,
The Snake And The Eggs,
The Cow Stepping Into The Milk Bucket
And
The Cat Falling Into The Buttermilk Churn ~

Looking Up At Mr. Deaton As He Patted Me On My Head,
I Smiled And Said
“ I Didn’t “

I hurriedly headed back home
with my ‘lil red wagon’
AND
50 Cents ~


[you really don’t have to tell everybody everything you know]


/_]*[__][] *[__|] ~ * '73 TZE063V101887 "
" O----------OO--]* ~ '78 TZE168V100234 "
" " Joe & Lavelle " "
" 'sweet home alebamy'

[Updated on: Fri, 03 February 2012 00:09]

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Re: [GMCnet] “ The Beauty Hill Cat Fiasco � [message #159069 is a reply to message #159060] Fri, 03 February 2012 07:21 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Ken Henderson is currently offline  Ken Henderson   United States
Messages: 8726
Registered: March 2004
Location: Americus, GA
Karma: 9
Senior Member
Joe,

That may not be GMC-related, but it's hilarious! Every detail brought back
to me vivid memories of my own childhood in the same era in SE Alabama. I
never lived on a farm, but my paternal grandparents did, so I was exposed
to all those conditions so I can just see that cat & dog going out that
un-screened kitchen window! :-)

Thanks,

Ken H.
<acts238bish
On Fri, Feb 3, 2012 at 1:09 AM, J A Hollandop wrote:

>
>
> “ The Beauty Hill Cat Fiasco ”
> { the real true story as told ny Joe Holland}
>
>
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Ken Henderson
Americus, GA
www.gmcwipersetc.com
Large Wiring Diagrams
76 X-Birchaven
76 X-Palm Beach
Re: [GMCnet] " The Beauty Hill Cat Fiasco " [message #159072 is a reply to message #159069] Fri, 03 February 2012 07:44 Go to previous messageGo to next message
stick miller is currently offline  stick miller   United States
Messages: 1036
Registered: March 2010
Location: Americus, Georgia
Karma: 0
Senior Member
Good stuff, Joe.

I've never lived on a farm. Never milked a cow. Never gathered eggs, never churned butter and never bartered for my food, but I know when something "rings true."

I might just steal that some day and use it in a column. Of course I'll give you full credit!


Stick Miller
'78 Royale - "White Trash" - she left me for another man
'76 Eleganza - "Cousin Eddie" Sold
'84 Bluebird Wanderlodge - "Past Tents"
Americus, GA
Re: [GMCnet] &#8220; The Beauty Hill Cat Fiasco &#8221; [message #159185 is a reply to message #159060] Fri, 03 February 2012 20:20 Go to previous messageGo to next message
USAussie is currently offline  USAussie   United States
Messages: 15912
Registered: July 2007
Location: Sydney, Australia
Karma: 6
Senior Member
Joe,

Sounds like the philosophy of eBay / Craigslist GMC sellers! ;-)

Regards,
Rob M.

-----Original Message-----
From: J A Holland

[you really don't have to tell everybody everything you know]

Joe


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Regards, Rob M. (USAussie) The Pedantic Mechanic Sydney, Australia '75 Avion - AUS - The Blue Streak TZE365V100428 '75 Avion - USA - Double Trouble TZE365V100426
Re: [GMCnet] “ The Beauty Hill Cat Fiasco ” [message #159195 is a reply to message #159185] Fri, 03 February 2012 21:18 Go to previous messageGo to next message
Harry is currently offline  Harry   Canada
Messages: 1888
Registered: October 2007
Location: Victoria, BC CANADA
Karma: 3
Senior Member
"I told him everything I know, and he still doesn't know anything"
Author Unknown
Re: [GMCnet] "The Beauty Hill Cat Fiasco" [message #159201 is a reply to message #159060] Fri, 03 February 2012 21:32 Go to previous message
Byron Songer is currently offline  Byron Songer   United States
Messages: 1912
Registered: August 2007
Location: Louisville, KY
Karma: -2
Senior Member

Great story and well told.

The cow kicking and the milk bucket reminds me of the story of the Amish
fellow with a cow that kicked him and the bucket one too many times.

He sat his three-legged stool back on the ground, picked up the bucket, and
climbed into the manger to look at the cow eye to eye.

He said: "Now Gertie, thou knowest that I am a kind man, that I will not
smite the nor curse then. But, if thou kickest me or the the bucket one more
time thou shalt find out that I have a friend that is a Presbyterian. I'll
sell thee to he and he'll beat the h**l out of you."

Your story also reminds me that my mom and her sister had a strict
step-mother. She would mom and her sister to town with the eggs and butter
to sell to the general store. Step-mother generally was up on the price of
eggs and butter and expected an accounting when the girls would return.
Step-mother couldn't read but she did know math and, of course, could count
coins rather well. On this particular trip they found that the price of eggs
had gone up. With unexpected increase in income they spent the difference on
candy and at it on the way home giving step-mother what she was expecting.

As you observed, it's best not to tell all you know.

--

Byron Songer
Louisville, KY
http://www.gmceast.com

Sights to see and places to stay
Find or submit a
GMCer recommendation
http://www.gmceast.com/travel


==========

J A Holland wrote:

"The Beauty Hill Cat Fiasco" {the real true story as told by Joe Holland}



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-- Byron Songer
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Former owner but still an admirer
GMC paint schemes at -
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