| [GMCnet] Drafting Guys Over 60 WAAAAY off topic! [message #69925] |
Thu, 07 January 2010 13:53  |
 |
USAussie
Messages: 15912
Registered: July 2007
Location: Sydney, Australia
Karma:
|
Senior Member |
|
|
OK, which one of you wrote this?
New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!
I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down
terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the
whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight,
they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military
unit until you're at least 35.
For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds.
Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than
28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.
Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a
dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We
are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately
deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for awhile.
An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always get
up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't
sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical
son-of-a-bitch.
If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put
them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.
Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and
yelled at and we're used to soft food.
We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for
years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and
yelling.
They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat
and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did
I ever do any pushups after completing basic training. Actually, the running
part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a
bullet.
An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to
shave, to start a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured
out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his
head.
These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more
about life before sending them off into harm's way.
Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last
thing an enemy would want to see is a couple million pissed off old farts
with attitudes and automatic weapons, who know that their best years are
already behind them.
HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50...in menopause!!! You think MEN
have attitudes??
Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put them on border patrol. They'll
have it secured the first night!
_______________________________________________
GMCnet mailing list
List Information and Subscription Options:
http://temp.gmcnet.org/cgi-bin/mailman/listinfo/gmclist
Regards,
Rob M. (USAussie)
The Pedantic Mechanic
Sydney, Australia
'75 Avion - AUS - The Blue Streak TZE365V100428
'75 Avion - USA - Double Trouble TZE365V100426
|
|
|
|
GMCforum
Search
Help
Register
Login
Home
